This Bear is trying to kill me.

Yeah so I started this blog. And I don’t um…blog.  Which poses a problem. 

The Bear and Shamwow have had me working non-stop.  Yknow, that eyes-glued-to-comp, might-go-blind, omg-I-have-to-pee-but-can’t-leave-comp kind of working. 

So yeah.  That’s my life.  I’m gonna give you a little background on the characters, cause I’m pretty sure it’s need-to-know.  These are real people, and I’m sure I’ll reveal their real names eventually.  Because they suck. 

Ok…why do we call Shamwow Shamwow?  Well it started out as Ms. Havisham.  Read Great Expectations much?  Ms. Havisham is an old spinster hermit type who was jilted – left at the altar on her wedding day.  Well, Shamwow’s hubby split town after she pressured him into getting her pregnant, had a baby, and became (read: continued to be) an uberbitch.  Do I feel bad for her?  Sure.  Do I kinda see his point?  Feh.

So, Havisham got a little too long to say.  Turned into Sham, Shammy, and finally settled on Shamwow, because who doesn’t love those commercials even though the dude in them beats up hookers?  Or gets beat up by hookers?  Can’t it be both?

The Bear.  Ok.  Ever been to a gay bar?  Notice how some of the ones are wearing super-tight tops (yes, tops, gay guys wear tops and not shirts)?  And then the big ones are showing their hairiness all over the place like a gay hair explosion?  Those are bears.  And let me tell you, even though The Bear reminds me of my daddy and also seems to be a tad homophobic, trust me, he’s a bear. 

So my social life’s gone down the shitter, along with my blogging life.  Or lack thereof.  Something.  I”ll try try, but no promises mmk?